My awesome hubs decided he’d throw me a surprise party for being such a kick-ass wife and mother to his babies. Except at this party, instead of punch and cake, there was more, like, crying and confusion and me asking ‘why does it feel like my soul is being ripped apart and set on fire?’
For gifts, he got me a lifetime supply of inequitable parenting work, emotional trauma, and an endless sense of injustice that I’m not aloud to voice to him. Oh, and a scarf. A really nice scarf.
There was even a surprise announcement that my husband had a new baby on the way! Not with me, you know. But hey, new baby!
And instead of music and friends, there was like this soundtrack of lies coming out of his mouth and a cavernous tomb of empty silence when he took his packed bag and left us stranded in a state with no family and no help.
But, you know. Other than that, it was super fun.
No surprise party like a surprise divorce partaaay! Woot woot!
Sigh.
Categories: Uncategorized
Honey and the Homewrecker. 
Actually, he didn’t leave. He slithered.
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I wish WordPress had a feature to do more than “Like” a post, such as indicate it makes you happy, sad, infuriated, confused, etc. My local paper has that feature in it’s comments. Just a thought. When I think of the term Divorce Surprise Party it makes me think of supportive friends gathering to lift the spirits of their friend and recognize their emergence from a dark and soul wrenching experience. I hope you get one of those parties in the future to counterbalance the situation you described above.
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I know, right? I will look into WordPress plugins that might address that. It’s kind of like on FaceBook when you just want to acknowledge your friend’s ‘Rest in peace, Uncle Joe. I’ll miss you terribly’ post. You used to only be able to click LIKE, and really, who wants to be the d-bag that likes that?! Thankful for the emoji responses that are on there now for that reason alone.
But there should be more. Like a ‘Hangry’ face to indicate you like this post about donuts, but that it makes you angry cuz you’re hungry and there’s no donuts anywhere near your mouth. Or ‘Repulsion’ face, for when that aunt describes her visit to the dermatologist in WAAAY too much detail. With many of my posts, there needs to be a ‘laugh/cry’ emoji, because hey! Sometimes it’s both. I don’t know about anyone else, but for me they are, anyway!
Thanks, Facingthevoid!
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